Dodgers Climb Out Of Cellar With Electrifying Victory Over Colorado’s Man Of Constant Sorrow

Tonight was a glorious night of Baseball! The Dodgers keep on rolling! Rolling, rolling, rolling! And when I say rolling, I mean utterly cruising. The Dodgers won their ninth game in their last ten. Clayton Kershaw gave the Dodgers another dominating performance, as he pitched a complete game four hit shutout over the Rockies in the first game of the three game series at Coors Field. The Dodgers win 8-0. Even sweeter, the club finally climbs out of last place, as the rest of the division lost.

We were all very excited to see how many home runs Yasiel Puig would hit in Denver, and he didn’t disappoint. The rookie sensation went 3 for 5 with a huge home run in the seventh inning, (his eighth) that landed in the center field shrubbery. The Dodger offense exploded again, as everyone in the lineup had at least one hit, except for Matt Kemp, and Kershaw. The Dodgers scored twice in the second and third frames. Then the boys in blue scored once in the fourth, seventh, eighth, and ninth frames.

Kershaw was dominating tonight-Chris Humphreys-USA TODAY Sports

Juan Uribe had two run scoring singles. Adrian Gonzalez blasted a two-run home run over the right field scoreboard in the third inning, (which gave the Dodgers a 4-0 lead at the time). Mark Ellis and Andre Ethier each contributed with run scoring singles, and Hanley Ramirez, extended his hitting streak to 13 games with a single and a double. Speaking of hitting streaks, the Dodgers snapped Michael Cuddyer’s 27 game hitting streak, as Kershaw gave him an 0 for 4 night. Cargo whiffed three times, as Colorado could only muster four measly singles off of Kershaw. The lefty whiffed eighth, and walked none. Kershaw needed just 108 pitches to properly dispose of the Rockies by a final score of 8-0.

The Dodgers hammered opposing starter, and aging country bumpkin Roy Oswalt for five runs on nine hits. Somehow Oswalt popped up with the Rockies this year, and has gotten off to a terrible start. The Mississippi native couldn’t make it out of the fifth. He had an ERA of 7.36 coming into this game, and served up five more runs in five lousy frames. The Dodgers handed the 36 year old veteran his third straight loss. Poor Oswalt, nobody knows his troubles. Speaking which, Oswalt is so country, that perhaps maybe he was one of the soggy bottom boys? We need to sing about the troubles of Roy Oswalt, because nobody knows his sorrows.

Poor Oswalt, nobody knows his sorrows!- Chris Humphreys-USA TODAY Sports

Let’s talk turkey first real quick, before we get into the game recap. As I am sure you all have already heard, the Dodgers acquired Carlos Marmol from the Chicago Cubs this afternoon, finalizing the trade that had been brewing for the past 48 hours. The Dodgers sent Matt Guerrier to the Cubs, in exchange for Marmol. The Dodgers also received a little over 200,000 dollars in international signing bonus. The Cubs are reportedly going to be paying for most of Marmol’s remaining salary for this season. Marmol is expected to appear in a few rehab games before joining the club.

In the top of the first, Oswalt gets Mark Ellis to pop out. Yasiel Puig singles to left. Unfortunately with Gonzalez at-bat, Puig is thrown out trying to steal. Gonzo pops out, and that does it in the first.

Kershaw retires lead-off man DJ LeMahieu on a grounder to second. Josh Rutledge’s one-hopper is bumbled by M.Ellis, allowing Rutledge to reach on the error. Cargo lines out to Puig, who has to make the catch while battling the sun. The red-hot Michael Cuddyer grounds out to third, and we’re scoreless after one.

Here’s where Oswalt’s troubles begin. So if this recap were a song of Oswalt’s troubles, it would go something like this…..

Oswalt is a man of sorrow

Cause OswAAAAAAAAAlt is a man of constant sorrow….when he allows Dodgers on base….

When he allooooooows Dodgers on Base!

(When he allows Dodgers on base!)

The Dodgers score first, by plating two runs on three singles in the top of the second. Hanley Ramirez, and Andre Ethier lead-off with consecutive singles. With runners at first and third, Matt Kemp’s grounder to third scored Hanley to give the Dodgers a 1-0 lead. Nolan Arenado looked a bit confused on the play, and Ethier takes second. A.J. Ellis walks, and Juan Uribe plates the second run of the frame, with a single up the middle. Ethier races around to score, and the Dodgers extend their lead to 2-0.

In the bottom of the second, Kershaw gets Nolan Arenado on a liner to left. Todd Helton fouls out to Uribe. With two outs, Yorvit Torrealba’s sinking liner to center is trapped by a sliding effort by Kemp. Tyler Colvin’s fly ball to center ends the inning.

Oswalt is a man of sorrow

For 12 long years I’ve pitched, but now I suck and I’m declined, and serve up runs….

I am Decliiiiiiiiined and serve up runs

(I am decliiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiined and serve up runs)…..

Oswalt is a man of sorrow

I bid fareweeeeeeeeell to old Kentuky, Mississsippi the place where I learned how to pitch……

The place where heeeeeee learned how to pitch!

(The place where heeeeeeeeeeeee learned how to pitch!)

Oswalt’s sorrows continued in the top of the third. The Dodgers scored two more runs in this frame. Puig leads-off with a long double off the top of the scoreboard wall in right field. Puig ends up with a stand-up double. Gonzalez immediately follows with a monstrous home run over the scoreboard and well up into the seats in right field. The Dodgers now lead 4-0 on Gonzo’s eleventh round tripper of the year.

Kershaw keeps cruising as he sets the Rockies down in order in the bottom of the third. Kershaw whiffs LeMahieu and Oswalt, and retires Rutledge on a pop up. We move into the fourth.

Unfortunately for Oswalt his troubles only continued. And nobody knows of his sorrows. Well maybe expect for Oswalt himself, and the rest of his teammates, and Colorado fans. The Dodgers plate another run in the top of the fourth, when AJ doubled into the gap. Although to be fair, he should have been throws out by a mile on that play. LeMahieu couldn’t handle the throw, and AJ just barely slides in safe. That AJ double preceded Uribe’s second run scoring single up the middle, scoring the hustling AJ. The Dodgers lead 5-0.

The story of Oswalt’s life above

Yasiel Puig-Chris Humphreys-USA TODAY Sports

Kershaw whiffs Cargo to start the bottom of the fourth. Cuddyer a fly out, and Arenado’s foul out sees Puig race over into foul territory to make a great running catch. Still 5-0 Blue into the fifth.

Kershaw breezes through another frame in the bottom of the fifth. After Helton’s grounder is the first out, Torrealba singles. Kershaw whiffs Tyler Colvin for out number two. Pinch-hitter Jordan Pacheco’s force out ends the inning.

The Dodgers knock Oswalt out of the game, as Colorado removes him after the fifth inning. The right hander allowed five runs on nine hits through five frames, while whiffing five. Right hander Adam Ottavino replaces Oswalt to pitch the top of the sixth.

Yasiel Puig bombs his eighth home run of the season in the top of the seventh, a hanging breaking ball that Puig crushed into the center field shrubbery off of Ottavino. The Dodgers lead 6-0.

Kershaw keeps on rolling through the seventh. He whiffs Arenado. Helton singles. That’s just the fourth hit Kershaw has allowed. Kersh gets Torrealba to ground into a double play. That’s it in the seventh. With Ottavino still on the mound in the top of the eighth, the Dodgers score another run. AJ doubles, and comes around to score on a Mark Ellis single. The Dodgers now lead 7-0. Kershaw delivers another 123 frame in the bottom of the eighth. The Dodgers are breezing.

The Dodgers plate an additional insurance run in the top of the ninth, off of Edgmer Escalona. Hanley doubles, Ethier’s RBI single sends him home. 8-0 Dodgers.

Los Angeles Dodgers pitcher Clayton Kershaw (22) delivers a pitch during the first inning against the Colorado Rockies at Coors Field.-Chris Humphreys-USA TODAY Sports

Kershaw finished off the game in the bottom of the ninth. Rutledge pops out. Cargo whiffs. Fittingly, Cuddyer flies out to right, as Puig records the final out. Dodgers win 8-0!

This may be one of the greatest nights for Dodger Baseball all season long! The Dodgers win puts them at 39-43, and coupled with Arizona’s 9-1 loss to the Mets, means the boys in blue are only 2.5 games back of first place. Not only that, but the rest of the division lost again. San Diego lost in Boston, and oh one more thing. Guess what happened to the Giants tonight? They were just no-hit by Homer Bailey and the Reds in Cincy. Guess who’s in last place now? (muahahahahahahahah!!!!) yes it’s the Giants. Welcome to your new home San Francisco!

Muahahahahaha! Giants in last place! muaahahahaha!

Enjoy your night Dodger fans. The Dodgers are finally out of the basement! The Dodgers are now in sole possession of third place, only a game behind Colorado for second.

The pure joy continues tomorrow in the second game of the series, as Zack Greinke counters tough right hander Tyler Chatwood at 5:10 PM.