We’ve come to the top two LA Dodger Bums. These are the cream of the crop. The pinnacle of uselessness. The epitome of pathetic.
Being a bum usually translates to being totally void of worthiness on the roster. Then there’s the bum who also garners a large salary yet provides little to no return on the millions spent. In what could be called the worst free agent signing in the history of Major League Baseball….
Your number two LA Dodger bum is ………………………………Andruw Jones.
Andruw Jones would have one of the most useless stints as a Dodger we have ever seen. Jones has always struck out a lot, but his fall from grace was fast and furious. It could be perhaps the single worst collapse in Dodger or baseball history. Once he became a Dodger he transformed into an overweight and horridly hitting bum, a bum like we had never seen before.
Andruw Rudolph Jones was born on April 23, 1977 in Willemstad, Curacao, Netherlands, Antilles (Kenley Jansen is from Curacao as well). He debuted on August 15, 1996 for the Atlanta Braves. Stories of Andruw’s baseball talent told of a young teen who was so good that he competed against adults. By the time he reached 15 years old, young Andruw was the best player on his small hometown Caribbean island.
At only 16 years old he was signed as a free agent with the Braves. He hit a homerun in his first at bat in single A ball, and went on to hit 25 homeruns, 100 RBI, and had 56 stolen bases. He went on to be named the Minor League Player of the Year.
At just 19 years old the Braves called up Jones.
The Braves beat the Cardinals that year in the NLDS and went on to face the Yankees in the World Series. Jones became the youngest player ever to homer in a World Series game when he hit two homeruns in his first two at bats in Game 1 of the 1996 series.
In 1997 Jones became the Braves everyday right fielder. In his first full season Jones finished with a .231 average, hit 18 homeruns, and had 70 RBI earning him a 5th place finish in the Rookie of the Year voting. In ’98 he moved to center field, and had a great season with a .271 average, 31 homeruns, and 27 stolen bases. Jones was still young, and often would act lazy on the field. Manager Bobby Cox was aggravated with this laziness and even pulled him out of a game in the middle of an inning in 1998, because he felt Jones let a fly ball drop for a single. In 2000 Jones had a career high .303 average with 36 homeruns and 104 RBI.
In 2001 the whiffs became plentiful. He did have 34 homeruns and 104 RBI but his average plummeted to .254 and he had 142 strikeouts. In 2004 he struck out 147 times. Had the young phenom plateaued? By now Jones had gained upwards of 30 pounds. He became so slow that he would not steal more than 11 bases in a season from here on out.
In 2005 Jones had a breakout year. He hit 51 homeruns, the most in the league along with 128 RBI. He finished second to Albert Pujols for the 2005 MVP award.
In 2008 the Braves announced they would not bring back Jones. Now up to this point Jones had a very good career with the Braves. He won 10 Gold Gloves, was a five time all-star, a Silver Slugger in 2005, and set many Braves franchise records. Well, we know what happens once the Dodger blue is worn for the first time. Transformation into a bum takes place.
On December 5, 2007 The Dodgers signed Andruw Jones to a 2-year $36.2 million deal. This deal made Jones the highest paid player in franchise history at the time. In other words, the highest paid Dodger bum of all time. This heady sum wouldn’t be fully paid until well after Jones left his bumprints as a complete bust.
Jones showed up to play for the Dodgers out of shape and overweight. He didn’t even reach the Mendoza line most of the season. He was so bad that in 116 at bats he only mustered 10 hits with runners in scoring position. He was so atrocious that the Dodgers started batting him 8th in the lineup. On May 23, 2008 Jones landed on the DL for the first time in his career. He had to have knee surgery after injuring it in batting practice.
Things got so bad in July of ’08 that Joe Torre benched Andruw. He said he’d only be used as a spot starter. At that time Jones had a .166 batting average with 2 homeruns and 12 RBI.
In September Jones was placed on the 60-day DL. He finished with a putrid .158 average, 3 homeruns, and 14 RBI. He had a mind-blowing 76 strikeouts in 209 at bats with only 33 hits in 2008. He was subsequently removed from the playoff roster and sent home packing for the winter. Jones whined that the fans didn’t give him a chance, and that he did not want to return to the Dodgers in 2009. The Dodgers agreed to release him in exchange for deferral of some of the remaining money due on his contract after they were unable to talk anyone into trading for him.
After signing a minor league deal with the Rangers, Jones had a small comeback of sorts. He finished 2009 with a .214 average, 17 homeruns in 82 games. When the Rangers played the Dodgers in two Interleague games he hit two homeruns against his former team. Of course he did.
Jones went on to play with the White Sox in 2010 and the Yankees in 2011. He is currently a free agent.
In 16 seasons, Jones has 420 homeruns and 1,677 strikeouts.
Andruw Jones, your number two bum, and the most expensive bum of all time. With that we’ve reached the number one spot. Who will take home the crown for the number one LA dodger bum? Who could possibly be worse? Come back tomorrow for the big reveal!